Li He

I was born in NYC in 1949 to Jeannette Wellin, a painter and sculptress, and to William Herrick, a court reporter and novelist, two devout atheists. After training in Zen and attending USC's graduate cinema program, I worked for Lorimar Film Entertainment studio, wrote a series of screenplays, attended NYU, became a successful couple's therapist, and immersed myself in the Hindu mystical tradition, Advaita Vedanta. During this period of family life, without a moment’s notice, I lost my son, Jake, when he was 15 months old. The grief was immense, yet surrendering to it led to a significant opening. A few years later I traveled to India to meet the spiritual master H.W.L. Poonjaji. Traveling from there to Nepal, I crossed paths with a remarkable 3-year old orphan. It took nine months, but my wife and I were ultimately able to adopt her.\n \nAs a boy, I sensed there was “something more.” It also troubled me that despite the desire for interior quiet, my mind would often race with thoughts. In college, my favorite professor introduced me to the world of mysticism–especially to Meister Eckhart and to Zen Buddhism. At twenty I began to train with Philip Kapleau, the first American to seriously train in Zen in Japan. Though I felt deeply inspired to Awaken and found that many years of meditation brought me greater serenity, I only experienced a few tiny peeks into the world beyond the ordinary mind.\n \nMy life changed dramatically when I reached my early sixties and moved to California. Almost preternaturally happy from childhood, for the first time I experienced profound, suicidal depression. The threat of financial ruin undercut my positive self-identity and an existential terror consumed me. For me, terror and suicidality ultimately became a great blessing as this humbling experience helped melt my heart. At the same time, during several long meditation retreats, with help from close friends, and in the course of my self-inquiry, I began to let go of identifying with success and to enjoy ever greater openings.\n \nAt around the same time, a surprising, tremendous up-pouring of creativity surged through me. Called to write about the spiritual experience, I began The Realm of Radiance. Soon after, I also began writing Fire \u0026amp; Light, a play inspired by a friend’s story and by Jewish mystical tales, and The Light of the Desert, a surrealistic novel about Jesus’s evolution from childhood.\n \nPerhaps most miraculously, I met my wife, the sorceress, Barbara Carroll, at a local café. She just was sitting there, as if by magic. Our mutual enchantment reached into and opened the deepest recesses of my heart. Together we have developed a four-step CODE to guide couples through the mysterious, semi-impossible labyrinth of relationship—and to help partners sustain long-term joy and passion. We are completing a nonfiction work, The Honeymoon CODE: Four Transformational Steps to Joyous, Lasting Love.\n \nBarbara and I have the good fortune to live half of our time overlooking the San Francisco Bay and the other half on California's Central Coast along the Pacific Ocean. We share our quarters with a wise calico cat and an adorable mutt who are head over paws in love with each other. We enjoy three adult children, one son-in-law and a daughter-in-law to be.